


L. radiata

by Auber_Gine_Dreams



Series: 1004 - Code Name: Angel [2]
Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Tokyo Ghoul, Ambiguous/Open Ending, Canon-Typical Violence, Explicit Sexual Content, Ghouls, Grief/Mourning, M/M, Past Character Death, Power Dynamics, Strangers to Lovers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-30
Updated: 2020-08-30
Packaged: 2021-03-06 21:53:56
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 17,364
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26056030
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Auber_Gine_Dreams/pseuds/Auber_Gine_Dreams
Summary: Maybe it’s because he can’t stop thinking about Wonwoo’s eyes. It was a trick of the light. It was the rush of adrenaline in his veins. His mind overreacting in the heat of the moment.But then he thinks of how easily Wonwoo, a graduate student, pinned down an S ranked ghoul. That kind of strength is hard to explain, but Wonwoo can’t be…Seungcheol refuses to even think it.
Relationships: Choi Seungcheol | S.Coups/Jeon Wonwoo
Series: 1004 - Code Name: Angel [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1761427
Comments: 23
Kudos: 65
Collections: Coup de Cœur - Round 1





	L. radiata

**Author's Note:**

> Hi welcome!! 
> 
> This fic is a collaborative AU with the amazingly talented [Ayesha](https://archiveofourown.org/users/deadlylampshades/pseuds/minhyukwithagun)!! She's written the first part and I'm taking over next! Her fic is not a required read for this to make sense, but if you want the Full Experience I recommend it!!
> 
> As mentioned in the tags, this is a Tokyo Ghoul AU meaning there WILL be violence, blood/gore and **DISCUSSIONS OF CANNIBALISM**. You don't have to be familiar with the series for this to make sense. The only things you need to know are:
> 
> 1) Kagune are a ghoul's predatory organ  
> 2) Quinque are weapons made from ghouls and they are used by the CCG
> 
> There is also a [Pinterest Board](https://www.pinterest.com/auber_gine_dreams/they-call-you-angel/717/) if you'd like some visuals! The entire AU is currently laid out in here, so if you feel like spoiling yourself on future installments have a look around ;)
> 
> Title is the scientific name of the red spider lily (Lycoris radiata). If you know, then you know.

_Longing, how soft a word_ _  
_ _For such a ravenous feeling_ _  
_ _How we hunger in silence_ _  
  
_

When he’s outside of the office, Seungcheol can’t help but think of his partner. Hui used to say that humanity was the biggest weakness of the CCG. He would follow it up with a gentle smile and add that humanity was also their biggest strength, but Seungcheol has come to understand the hidden meaning behind these words in the last month. He stands at the edge of the university campus, buildings tall and sprawling, students milling about in front of the bookstores and cafes. Loneliness claws at his ribs, wound reopened. Everyone at the CCG is prepared for death. To see it, to deal it out, to fall victim.

He’s never been without a partner, is all. It makes him weaker than the enemy he’s looking for. And Hui was always better at interviews.

The information they have is limited. An obvious effect of the raid. Fewer agents means fewer leads, which means Seungcheol is at the university with only the knowledge that there is a ghoul on the loose. Since the raid, people are less willing to even speak to the CCG. He’s put on his street clothes, dark jeans and a faded hoodie from his own time at university, but he feels like an outsider all the same, like every part of him is stained with blood, not just his standard issue trench coat. 

He orders an americano from the coffee shop that seems to have the most students. By the time he’s gotten his coffee, the inside of the shop is standing room only. Outside, there’s a gentle breeze. A beam of sunlight hits him right in the eyes. He shields them with his other hand, and off to his left he catches sight of a free seat. 

There’s a man already at the table dressed in university casual. Athletic pants, hoodie, beanie, glasses. He’s got a book open in front of him, his phone on the other side with some mobile game paused. Like he’s rewarding himself for getting through his reading. 

“Do you mind if I sit here?” Seungcheol asks. The man looks up, squinting a little. He pushes his glasses up his nose.

“Go ahead,” he answers. Seungcheol mumbles a quick thanks and scoots the metal chair in front of him out, settling in and taking the white lid off his coffee so it cools faster. From here he can see the book the man is reading more clearly, something about economics. Class assignment or natural curiosity?

“That looks pretty advanced,” Seungcheol says, blowing on his coffee before taking a sip. “Do you study that or do you just like reading?”

The man looks up and meets his eyes. They’re dark brown, something almost piercing to his gaze. 

“Why can’t it be both?” he asks, lip quirking up at the corner. “Are Graduate students supposed to hate reading? Is that the narrative these days?”

Seungcheol grins and shakes his head. “I think you’re allowed to like whatever you want to like.” He holds out his hand even as his brain screams that he’s blowing his cover. “I’m Seungcheol.” The words _First Class Senior Investigator_ are new, but the discipline to add them to his name are not. He barely manages to hold them back. “I’m uh, newly transferred. From the 5th Ward.” It skirts the truth enough to feel believable.

The man takes his hand and gives it a quick shake. “Wonwoo. I’m a Graduate Student. Literature.” He smirks down at the book before meeting his eyes again. “This is just to broaden my horizons.”

“It’s nice to meet you,” Seungcheol says. He takes a few more sips of coffee and sits in the companionable silence, watching Wonwoo’s eyes flit across the paper. He tries to imagine what Hui would do in a situation like this, with most of their men dead or hospitalized. How would he start things off?

“So I heard there was a ghoul attack on campus.” 

Wonwoo frowns and looks up. Well, obviously Hui would have more tact. 

“I don’t normally pay attention to that stuff,” Wonwoo answers softly. His eyes roam Seungcheol’s face like he’s looking for something. _You can trust me_ , Seungcheol wants to say. He tries to relay it in his face. “But this one happened when I was staying at a friend’s dorm. Two floors down from him. The screams woke everyone up.”

Seungcheol reaches across the table and gives one of Wonwoo’s hands a squeeze. It’s a habit from the job, comfort the victim but get the information you need. He’s cold under Seungcheol’s hand, even with how warmly he’s dressed. 

“Hasn’t the CCG come here to investigate?” Seungcheol asks. Wonwoo shakes his head.

“If they did, no one mentioned it. Besides, they’ve sort of had their hands full. There was a raid a while back. The force was almost completely wiped out.”

 _My partner wore a very special necklace_ , Seungcheol almost says. _That was the only way we could identify his body_. _There was nothing much left of him except for that_. He looks down at where his hand is still resting over Wonwoo’s. He takes it back and downs the rest of his coffee. 

“I’ve only heard about the raid a little. Sounds awful.”

There’s a strange kind of tilt to Wonwoo’s mouth, like he wants to make a face, like there’s something he’s itching to say but can’t. Seungcheol wonders if he’s one of those ghoul sympathizer types who think there’s a path to coexistence. 

“It’s just our lives now. Raids from both sides. Death all around. On the plus side it makes for really symbolic literary essays.”

Wonwoo gives him a soft smile and Seungcheol has to bite his lip to keep from laughing.

“That’s certainly one way to look at it,” Seungcheol says. “So no one has talked about what the ghoul might look like? Anything to watch out for?”

Wonwoo shuts his book and shakes his head.

“The best I can say is watch out for yourself.” There’s a cat-like tilt to the corner of his mouth. “They say the ghoul only eats good looking men.”

His ears burn as Wonwoo stands up. He’s looking down at Seungcheol with a full on grin now, white teeth almost glinting in the sunlight. 

“Then you should watch out too, don’t you think?” Seungcheol counters with a smile of his own. Wonwoo is really handsome. If he were actually a university student instead of a Special Class Investigator he might try his luck. 

Wonwoo huffs a laugh and shakes his head. 

“I’ve got to get to class. Maybe I’ll see you around,” he says. He tucks his book under his arm and pockets his phone. 

They say a quick and only slightly awkward goodbye. He watches Wonwoo walk away, tall and willowy and sure of himself. 

_Maybe you will_ , Seungcheol thinks. 

He’s going to have to continue the investigation, after all.

  
  


**♟♟♟**

  
  


Seungcheol takes to patrolling the university at night, half order from the Commissioner and half of his own volition. It’s a good show to the community. The CCG has taken a hit, but they will not fall. They will protect the people from the monsters who freely roam among them. After Hyungwon is released from medical leave it’s easier to breathe, feels like things can get back to some kind of normal. 

Ghouls are not nocturnal. It’s more the nature of what they do that confines them to the shadows. Killing a person is rarely a quiet affair. The blood, too, is much more noticeable in the light. They usually eat as much as they can and leave the rest for the CCG to clean up, and Seungcheol has done enough of that to last him the rest of his life.

Seungcheol starts in the middle of campus, on the huge lawn between the main academic buildings. There is a fountain in the center, off at this hour, the water clear and flat, reflecting the moon overhead like a mirror. It’s the first time he’s done this alone. Even when they split up, there was the knowledge that his partner was close enough to help if something went wrong. 

There is a bitter, deep-seeded guilt that Seungcheol doesn’t know if he will ever get rid of. Hui sent him on an errand. Important, necessary, but it meant that when Hui needed him he was two wards away instead of with his partner. When his eyes slipped closed for the last time, was he angry with Seungcheol? Did he feel betrayed? 

In a way, he understands Hyungwon’s feelings better than anyone. Hyungwon hasn’t talked about that part, but Seungcheol knows what it feels like to hear the death toll and know you could have done something about it, even if that something was to die next to your comrades. Hyungwon is singularly focused on #113, and even though Seungcheol thinks it’s a terrible idea, he hardly has a better alternative.

He walks toward the first set of dorms. It’s a pleasant night. The air is just cool enough for a jacket, though Seungcheol would be wearing his trench coat no matter what. He circles the two dorm buildings and heads across the main quad toward the other side of campus. There are another pair of dorm buildings tucked away behind two huge oak trees. 

It’s here that Seungcheol hears footsteps, a girl’s gentle laugh. He takes cover behind the closest of the oaks. He can just make out the two figures, a tall man and a shorter woman. The man’s arm is wrapped around her shoulders. They walk and talk, though their conversation is too hushed for Seungcheol to make out any words. 

Seungcheol steps away from the tree and onto the sidewalk at the same time a figure lands crouched in front of the couple. Seungcheol reaches into his coat pocket and his quinque is in his hand by pure muscle memory. Small, at first, because that’s the way he asked it to be made. 

“Freeze. All of you,” Seungcheol calls. His hand is tight on his quinque. He takes a few steps closer, until he can make out the face of Wonwoo and a girl. The other figure turns to him with black eyes, red pupils, a wide, grinning mouth. 

“You’re not welcome here, Dove,” the ghoul says. 

Seungcheol flicks his quinque down at his side, extending it into a fully formed blade. The ghoul stares at it wide eyed.

Wonwoo is staring at him, too, face drained of color, the girl pulled behind him protectively. His girlfriend? It’s a sweet gesture, but the ghoul staring them down will rip everyone to pieces without breaking a sweat. Seungcheol’s top priority is keeping them alive.

“I’m pretty sure it’s you that’s not welcome,” Seungcheol says. He keeps his eyes trained on the ghoul’s hands, on his pitch black eyes.

“Aren’t you gonna ask my name?” the ghoul asks, taking a few steps toward Seungcheol. It’s like his quinque is some kind of magnet, like now that the ghoul has seen it, it’s the only thing he cares about. He wonders for a moment, absently, if he knows the ghoul it was made from.

Seungcheol adjusts his hold on the hilt, relaxes his arm, readies himself to strike.

“I don’t care about your name. I care about you going on a feeding frenzy and terrorizing the students on campus. I care about keeping humans safe.”

The ghoul runs a hand through his dark hair, pushing it back out of his eyes. 

“You should care. I have a pretty high number, you know.” The ghoul grins. “But I’m just passing through. If you have a ghoul problem you should look elsewhere.”

 _Yeah right_ , Seungcheol thinks. If this ghoul were passing through he wouldn’t have made himself so obvious. He’s looking for a meal, and Seungcheol refuses to let him kill anyone. Not when he can stop it.

Seungcheol raises his sword and the ghoul sighs. His kagune extends out from his shoulder blade, less like a wing and more like a whip, red like the color of fresh blood. He rushes toward Seungcheol and strikes out. Seungcheol blocks with his quinque, the force of it shaking through his entire arm. The girl behind Wonwoo gasps. 

“I’m #106,” the ghoul says. He is so close that Seungcheol can see how white his teeth are.

He feels like he’s been dipped in boiling water, the file flashing crystal clear in front of his eyes. 106, A rank. Uses the name Jaebum. 

The ghoul in question ducks to the side and swipes at Seungcheol’s shoulder with his kagune. It’s a very near miss. Seungcheol jumps back as fast as he can, eyes locking with Wonwoo.

“Run. Both of you!” Seungcheol yells, sword coming up to parry another strike automatically. Wonwoo gives him a jerky nod, eyes still locked on his quinque, on his face, on the ghoul he’s fighting. 

Jaebum is not the strongest ghoul Seungcheol has ever fought, but he’s certainly no pushover. Each strike makes his arm ache, and when Jaebum lands a punch to his cheek he swears he can feel a crack in the bone. 

Jaebum runs a hand through his hair. “You’re stronger than you look,” he says. “I like that. You’ll be a decent meal, at least.”

It’s in this moment, Jaebum staring at him with lips slightly parted and hungry, dark eyes, that Seungcheol changes his grip on his quinque and rushes the ghoul, tackling him to the sidewalk. He presses the blade tight to Jaebum’s throat. Like this, he can see Wonwoo and the girl out of the corner of his eye. 

“Get out of here!” Seungcheol yells again, and this time Wonwoo seems to snap out of his trance, turning behind him to speak to the girl. He takes a few steps down the sidewalk, holds his hand out in a gesture to follow. She’s very pretty, even terrified and pale. Her hair falls in long waves down her back, shining in the moonlight.

“How sweet,” Jaebum coos. Seungcheol squeezes the ghoul between his legs in an effort to silence him, but it just makes him roll his eyes.

It happens at nearly the same time. Seungcheol remembers that #106 doesn’t hunt alone, that his partner is never far behind, and Wonwoo is knocked to the ground, landing hard with a grunt. The girl’s eyes are wide. The front of her dress blooms crimson with blood. She doesn’t even have time to scream. The ghoul behind her pulls his hand out of her stomach. She falls to her knees, eyes glazed, and the ghoul is left staring at the blood on his hand with something almost like disgust. 

“Took you long enough,” Jaebum says. Seungcheol feels all of his blood freeze. 

They’re all going to die.

The ghoul in front of him is #929, S rank, Gourmet. That’s why he wrinkled his nose at the girl’s blood. Probably not up to his standards.

“ _Jinyoungie_ ,” Jaebum whines, “Will you get him off me already? I want to go home.”

The ghoul in question turns toward them and rolls his eyes. 

“Do you think this is fun for me? Having to clean up your messes?” Jinyoung asks. He steps over the girl, her body slumped against the sidewalk, blood fanning around her. Seungcheol allows himself a brief moment of sorrow at her loss. 

Jinyoung takes a few more steps. Wonwoo hasn’t gotten up. Seungcheol wonders for a moment if he’s unconscious, if his head hit the concrete so hard that he will not wake up again. Seungcheol presses his sword tighter against Jaebum’s neck. A slow line of blood trickles out and Jaebum growls low in his throat. 

“I can clean up my own messes,” he says, grinning with all his teeth. Lightning fast, his kagune is around Seungcheol’s throat, his hand around the blade at his neck. The strength takes him by surprise. 

Seungcheol is hurled into the air. It’s an impressive arc. He hits the ground between the two oak trees, his breath knocked out of him all at once. Jaebum stands easily, brushing the dirt off his jeans casually, like their little scuffle was nothing at all. Seungcheol scrambles to his knees, gasping in breath as he tries to regain his bearings. He needs to get his quinque. He needs to see if Wonwoo is okay.

Jinyoung looks at Jaebum with an expression Seungcheol has seen maybe twice in his life. Like Jaebum is his whole world. Like there is no separating them. It’s way too human an expression for a monster whose hands are covered in blood. 

Behind the two of them, Wonwoo sits up. Seungcheol tries not to draw any attention to it, keeps his eyes on the ghouls for what good it will do the two of them. Wonwoo glances at the girl, the color draining from his face at the sight of her blood. 

He really hopes she wasn’t his girlfriend. 

Seungcheol can see his fists tighten at his side. Jinyoung takes another step toward Jaebum. Something is going to happen. Seungcheol rises to his feet, and the two ghouls turn to him at the same time.

“Ready for more?” Jaebum asks, eyes flashing bright red in the moonlight. 

And just like that, Wonwoo moves.

Jinyoung is on the ground, staring up at Wonwoo with wide eyes. Jaebum turns to look at the two of them and Seungcheol breaks into a run, slamming his body into the ghoul and taking him down again. He hits the soft grass, on his stomach this time, with a groan. 

Low murmurs. Seungcheol can’t make out anything that Wonwoo is saying to the ghoul. He imagines it’s something like, _why did you kill her, I’m going to kill you too_. 

#106 laughs underneath him.

“What’s so funny?” Seungcheol grits, bringing his quinque back to the ghoul’s throat.

He turns his head so he can regard Seungcheol with one dark eye, red pupil almost lit from the inside with glee.

“He’s asking your little friend if eating him will put him on a hit list.” Jaebum chuckles again. “Jinyoung is very picky with his food, you know. Even if he was fair game, I doubt something like him would be very delicious.”

Seungcheol works the cuffs out of his pocket one handed. He brings the ghoul’s wrists together and slaps the cuffs on him, the metallic click enough to ease a bit of the tension out of his shoulders. He rises to his feet carefully, dragging #106 with him. Wonwoo must be stronger than he looks to have kept an S rank ghoul pinned down for so long, but eventually his strength, and more likely his luck, will run out.

“Move, or I’ll kill you where you stand,” Seungcheol murmurs. Jaebum sighs but starts walking.

Wonwoo and the ghoul stop talking as they approach. Jinyoung looks at Jaebum, eyes roaming all over him, checking, assessing, caring. Wonwoo, meanwhile, looks at Seungcheol. For a split second, so fast that Seungcheol is sure he’s imagined it, Wonwoo’s eyes are black, pupils red like blood. Seungcheol slams his eyes shut and opens them again. Wonwoo is staring at him, white eyes with a spot of dark brown.

“You’re both under arrest,” Seungcheol says. He shoves Jaebum to his knees on the grass. #922 looks at him with furrowed brows. The cuffs have Rc suppressants, so the moment they are on a ghoul’s wrist the use of their kagune is gone. 

“And just what is our crime?” Jinyoung asks. He struggles against Wonwoo’s hold, but in a frightening display of strength, he grips the ghoul’s wrists in his hands, slamming them into the concrete. 

“He thinks we’ve been eating students,” Jaebum answers before Seungcheol has the chance to speak. “As if you’d ever subject yourself to whatever university students put in their bodies.”

There’s no point in reminding them about the dead girl on the ground. To them, she was no one, just in the way. 

“Was she your girlfriend?” Seungcheol asks before he can stop himself. Wonwoo glances toward the girl’s body, the dark pool of blood fanned out around her, and shakes his head. 

“Just a friend. Doesn’t make it any better.”

Seungcheol tosses a set of cuffs to Wonwoo, who catches them and nearly drops them when they’re in his hand. 

“I’m sorry,” Seungcheol says. It doesn’t feel like enough, but there’s nothing else he can offer Wonwoo right now. He hopes the ghouls in cuffs soothes some of the ache. 

Wonwoo closes the cuffs around Jinyoung’s wrists. They end up nearly kissing close, and Jinyoung bears his teeth and growls. Wonwoo stares at him for a long time, unafraid and unmoving. It makes goosebumps break out on Seungcheol’s arms.

Seungcheol grabs his phone out of his pocket and enters the CCG’s emergency number, relaying the details of the attack almost robotically. 

He wants to say, _I wish there was something I could do for you,_ but much like the apology he offered, the words seem hollow. He wants to comfort Wonwoo, to crush him against his chest and feel his heart beat against him. Maybe it’s the adrenaline, or maybe it’s that Seungcheol hasn’t really been able to get Wonwoo out of his mind since the first time they saw each other.

It’s maybe five minutes before the soft wail of sirens becomes a roar. Finally. Seungcheol might actually be able to take a breath soon.

“I can’t be here,” Wonwoo says suddenly, scrambling off of Jinyoung. He looks at Seungcheol, still white faced and wide eyed. “I can’t. I have to go.”

“Wait. You can’t just _leave_ ,” Seungcheol says, but Jinyoung picks that exact moment to crawl to his knees, hands cuffed in front of him. Seungcheol walks over and yanks him back to the ground, and by the time he looks up Wonwoo is gone. 

The wind blows through the trees. Seungcheol shivers. 

The sound of car doors slamming consumes the silence. A flurry of CCG officials swarm over the area, approaching #106 and #922 like they are just as dangerous as their files say they are. 

The rest of the scene fades into background noise. Seungcheol gives the lead officer a quick rundown of the situation. The ghouls are tossed into the back of a reinforced transport truck. All in all, it is a close call for Seungcheol. One casualty, but two wanted ghouls in custody. He doesn’t mention Wonwoo, though he’s not sure why.

Maybe it’s because he can’t stop thinking about Wonwoo’s eyes. It was a trick of the light. It was the rush of adrenaline in his veins. His mind overreacting in the heat of the moment. 

But then he thinks of how easily Wonwoo, a graduate student, pinned down an S ranked ghoul. That kind of strength is hard to explain, but Wonwoo can’t be…

Seungcheol refuses to even think it. It feels too much like a bad omen, even as the sirens fade and Seungcheol is tucked into his car. He tries very hard to think about nothing at all on the drive home. He thinks about Hui instead. 

  
  


**♟♟♟**

Two weeks of calm, and the university is rocked by another kill. Seungcheol had sort of hoped that the ghouls he captured were lying, that they were the cause of all the death on campus. He can still see the gleam in the eyes of #106, the way his mouth had curled into a smirk, like he knew a secret. He chugs a lukewarm coffee and makes the fifteen minute walk to the university in ten. 

It’s easy enough to find the scene of the crime. Yellow tape and a crowd of students, hushed whispers and pale faces. His trenchcoat is indication enough of who he is. The crowd parts and he ducks under the tape.

“It’s a mess in there,” the nearest officer says, face shining with sweat. “Kid’s still in there, too.”

“You mean the body?” Seungcheol asks, quirking an eyebrow.

The officer shakes his head. “No. The roommate.”

Seungcheol rushes up the stairs without another word to the men. Most of the doors are open, left from the hasty evacuation of the residents. Here and there, random rooms are dotted with gore. An arm sticking out into the hall. He glances into another room only to see a bloodsoaked sheet covering a body, blood still dripping to the floor in slow, irregular drips. There’s no way to know what the death toll is just from looking, but Seungcheol can imagine it’s not going to be a pretty number. At the end of the hall one door has been ripped off the hinges. The carpet in front is soaked with blood. There’s no way for him to avoid it, and when he gets to the doorway Seungcheol’s shoes squelch against the wetness. 

The boy (a man, really, but right now he looks too young for that), doesn’t react to Seungcheol’s presence. He’s sitting on what must be his bed, a blanket draped around his shoulders, specks of blood dotting his cheeks like freckles. Seungcheol wonders if the officers downstairs even tried to take him out of the room. Did he demand to stay?

The room itself is something out of a nightmare. There is hardly enough of a body left to call it that, between what has been splattered on the wall and what is left in a heap on the floor. Seungcheol takes a deep breath and walks into the room, coming to a stop in front of the boy.

“My name is Seungcheol. I’m a First Class Senior Investigator with the CCG.” He turns to face him. “Can I ask your name?”

The boy looks up at him slowly. His eyes are glazed, like he’s still in shock, breathing fast and shallow through his mouth. His face is white, but other than the smattering of blood on his cheeks it doesn’t look like he’s been injured. 

He opens his mouth to speak, closes it, clears his throat a little and tries again.

“Joshua, sir. I’m Joshua Hong.” 

Seungcheol nods, extending his hand. “It’s nice to meet you, Joshua.”

The boy looks at his hand, tentative, like a hungry cat offered a treat. He stares for a few heartbeats before he reaches out and takes it. His handshake is surprisingly steady, not the desperate grip of fear that Seungcheol expects.

“This is your room, right?” Seungcheol asks. 

Joshua nods. “There was so much screaming outside. That’s what woke me up. I didn’t...I wasn’t...” 

Seungcheol’s first thought is that it must be terrifying. He was so close to death, might have slept through the whole thing if not for the students rushing outside. He wonders for a moment if the ghoul was still in the room when Joshua woke up. Did he get a good look at the monster, or was he already gone by then?

Joshua blinks rapidly, takes his hand out of Seungcheol’s and scrubs his eyes. He knows what Joshua couldn’t say. Of course he does. _I didn’t know he was being eaten. I wasn’t awake to help him._ There is nothing Seungcheol is more acutely familiar with than the way guilt twists your organs into knots. He sits down next to Joshua without asking permission. 

“You’re very lucky to be alive,” Seungcheol says, because it’s true. It’s going to take a long time for Joshua to believe it, he’s sure, but it’s the only comfort he can offer.

“There’s got to be a reason,” Joshua says, turning to face him. His eyes are clearer, shining with a hard glint of determination. Small, but it’s there. “There’s got to be something I can do. Some way for me to help.”

“With the case?” Seungcheol asks. “Well, if you happened to see what the ghoul looked like —”

“ _No_ ,” Joshua says, cutting him off. He’s almost erratic, emotions understandably clouding his thoughts. “I need to do something about this. About _them_.”

It’s not as unusual as people might think. Many CCG investigators are former victims. Families wiped out, near miss attacks. Seungcheol joined the CCG because he wanted to and that makes him one of the lucky ones. He remembers the whispers when Hui walked in to give a lecture at the Academy, ( _His partner left him for someone else, and they both got attacked_ . _The ghouls that killed them are ranked SS now._ ) how Hui never seemed as bitter as Seungcheol thought he should be. How even after he lost everything, there was something in him that always wanted to do the right thing, to be the hero.

Seungcheol looks at Joshua. The spark in his eyes, small as it is, reminds him of Hui. 

“If you want to help, you should join the CCG. There’s no better place to be if you want to make a difference.”

Joshua’s eyes widen, like something has finally clicked into place. 

“But first we need to get you out of here,” Seungcheol continues, standing up and holding his hand out to Joshua. “Do you have a friend I can call?”

Joshua takes his hand and rises to his feet. The blanket falls off his shoulders, revealing splatters of blood on his shirt, dried into sticky patches on his skin. 

“Jun. We have Lit class together. He, um, I think he won’t freak out too much,” Joshua answers softly. “I don’t really have anyone else.”

Seungcheol can’t help but reach out and squeeze his shoulder. The world is not kind, but it doesn’t make it easier to hear each time he’s faced with that reality.

“I owe you an apology.” Joshua’s eyes are wide with surprise. He shakes his head and Seungcheol holds up a hand to stop him. “No. This is my case. I’m sorry this happened to you, and I promise that I’m going to find the ghoul responsible for this and lock him away. I won’t let anyone else get hurt.”

Joshua looks at him for a long time before he nods. Seungcheol takes his hand and leads him out of the room. When they get outside, Seungcheol passes Joshua his phone. His friend picks up right away, and Joshua spends most of the call assuring this Jun that he’s okay. There’s a second voice over the phone then, softer but somehow stronger. Joshua assures this person, too, that he’s fine. He hangs up and passes the phone back to Seungcheol. 

“Jun’s apartment is close by,” he says. He scans the faces of the students outside, spares a glance to his own bloody clothes. He’s only wearing socks, and Seungcheol feels like smacking himself for not noticing sooner. 

“I’ll walk you there,” Seungcheol says. Joshua makes a face, clearly saying _are you sure_ , but he nods, grateful. 

It’s a short walk. Seungcheol keeps them on the grass as much as he can. Joshua’s socks will be ruined but his feet will be fine. Clothes are replaceable, after all.

When they arrive at the apartment, Joshua bows ninety degrees.

“I can’t thank you enough, sir.”

Seungcheol holds his hands in front of him. This isn’t what he was expecting. Maybe the burden of it will light a fire under him. Maybe he’ll be able to find the damn ghoul.

“Thank me when the ghoul is in a glass cell in the Cochlea,” he says, instead.

Joshua walks inside the building, and Seungcheol wonders for a moment if the boy will put any consideration into his suggestion. The CCG is regaining manpower at a snail’s pace. They could use a good man like him, though.

He’ll just have to wait and see.

**♟♟♟**

The next day Seungcheol goes into work, down instead of up, and heads straight for the records department. He starts with #101 (binge eater, alias Kun), looks through every file for ghouls that would blend into a university campus, ghouls that would want easy prey. It’s quick work to rule most of the gourmets out, and any of them that would prefer university aged humans are already locked up or dead. 

The only reason he leaves the dank, windowless room is to stake out the university campus. He wears his trench coat proudly, now, wants the ghoul to know his days are numbered. For three days this is his routine. Straight from the campus to the tiny room, only stopping by his desk to grab a protein bar from his desk and a quick shower in one of the upper floor bathrooms. Reads files, categorizing them by likelihood. He almost feels bad for the intern that will have to clean up his mess when he’s done. 

The list is surprisingly small by the time he makes it to the 700s. Names and faces blend together, and the last file he looks at before his alarm goes off is #716, some no name ghoul killed during a raid on the 6th ward. He tosses it in the deceased pile, sparing a glance to the file of #717. He has the strangest feeling he should look at it, but he shrugs it off, slips his trench coat on and makes his way out of the room. 

The campus has been impossibly quiet since the last attack. Many students have taken the offer to go home, convert their classes to online equivalents and stay in their suburban neighborhoods under the guise of safety. It’s the students that remain that Seungcheol worries about the most. People like Joshua. He wonders if the boy is staying with his friends permanently. Maybe he’s back in a dorm, different room but same look. The memory would be too vivid if it were him. 

He wanders around the familiar paths. The route he takes is different each time. If someone is watching him, he doesn’t want them to think there’s a routine. It’s a new moon, the sky dark, his only light from the scattered lamp posts. He closes in on the second dorm, the one across campus from Joshua’s. The front of the building is dark, no lights in any of the windows. It makes everything feel strange, like he’s walking through the apocalypse. Everything has this unreal quality. A dream, maybe.

Seungcheol walks around the side of the building, and it’s then that he hears a strange sound. Snapping like branches. A scream. In the distance, he sees a flash of bright blue. A kagune, there’s no doubt.

He runs. There is no time for him to hesitate. He pulls his quinque out of his pocket and extends it as he rounds the corner. There’s another flash, a crunch and a scream as someone hits the side of the building. There is a single streetlight behind the dorm, and from here all Seungcheol can see is blood. Dark, pooling. A sharp inhale. Another crunch, this one wetter. He’s out of time.

He makes it to the dumpster, blade ready to strike, and he does. Fast and brutal. He doesn’t even have a visual on the ghoul, attacking purely on instinct. The bright blue kagune, hard and armored, wraps around his quinque, pulls it easily from his hands even as he struggles with all his strength. He falls hard against the ground and the ghoul holds his weapon high in the air, almost taunting him.

It feels like a moment from a movie. The pan up to ghoul’s face is slow. He has time to take in the dark pants, the button down, bloody hole in his side already healed. The pulsing blue of his kagune, dripping with blood. Everything grinds to a halt. 

The body on the ground is also a ghoul. The kagune is an obvious giveaway, much like the black iris and red pupil staring lifelessly at the sky. There’s another, living threat, but Seungcheol is rooted to the spot. The ghoul is frozen, too, his eyes wide. He drops Seungcheol’s quinque and hastily wipes the blood from his mouth. The clatter as it hits the ground is like shattered glass.

“ _You_ ,” Seungcheol breathes. “What are you —”

Wonwoo’s mouth is dark crimson, hands held out in front of him. _It’s not what it looks like_ , his red eyes say, except that it’s exactly what it looks like. 

_Wonwoo_. 

Wonwoo, the graduate student, handsome, kind, smart and strangely strong. His hands are practically dripping with blood. His body gradually relaxes in front of Seungcheol’s eyes, his kagune lowering slowly. 

“I found him,” Wonwoo says. Out of everything Seungcheol is expecting him to say, it’s not this. 

The dead ghoul is the one he’s been looking for, the one responsible for all the deaths on campus? His face is unfamiliar. It’s possible he’s been flying under the radar the entire time, that the CCG doesn’t even have a number for him, much less a code name. 

“I took care of it,” Wonwoo finishes.

Seungcheol’s eyes snap up to meet his. Everything is rearranging right in front of him. The entire incident a few weeks ago makes much more sense now. Even Jaebum’s words. _I doubt something like him would be very delicious_.

They knew. Of course they did. It feels like a big joke. Like he’s been made a fool of. 

“All this time you’ve been... _how did I not realize it_?” Seungcheol asks. He doesn’t think there’s a good answer.

Wonwoo wipes the blood on his hands onto his dark pants. His eyes are almost back to normal, the black fading away into white, red pupils bleeding back to brown.

“Are you going to arrest me?” Wonwoo asks instead. “I haven’t killed any humans. And we both know there’s no law about killing ghouls.”

It makes the inside of Seungcheol’s mouth taste sour. The thing is, Wonwoo is right. What he’s done is incomprehensible, but it’s not illegal. Not in the same way that it would be if the man on the ground was human. Wonwoo’s kagune is still visible, plated blue arms wavering gently in the air behind him. 

“ _Kakuja_ ,” Seungcheol breathes. Wonwoo’s entire body stiffens. “That’s how you’ve gone unnoticed all this time. You don’t eat humans at all, do you?”

When ghouls repeatedly eat other ghouls, their body absorbs the excess Rc cells leading to the formation of a stronger kagune. The evidence is right in front of him, undeniable.

Wonwoo holds his hands in front of him again. 

“Not...always.” Wonwoo sighs. Seungcheol wonders for a moment what it must feel like to be a traitor to your own kind. “Ghouls who kill without a reason don’t deserve mercy. He killed a friend of mine. Didn’t even eat him, just left him in his dorm. It drove me crazy. You can’t imagine how hard I’ve been looking for him.”

 _I can_ , Seungcheol thinks. Probably as hard as him. If this were a different world, maybe they could have worked together. His quinque is still on the ground. There’s nothing he can do against a ghoul like Wonwoo without it, though the fact that he has a kakuja means he’s much stronger than he looks. 

Letting him go feels strange. It goes against everything Seungcheol believes in. There are some who would say that Wonwoo’s crime is being a ghoul, but that doesn’t sit right either. There’s no solution that will make him feel totally okay.

“What happens if I let you leave?”

Wonwoo’s eyes widen, hands resting on his hips. There’s a bit of dried blood on his cheek.

“We go our separate ways,” he answers. “I don’t plan on causing you any trouble. I needed him out of the way so things would quiet down again. I’m not going to take his place as the campus killer.”

 _You needed to eat_ , Seungcheol thinks but doesn’t say. _There’s that, too_.

He stares at him for a long time. It still doesn’t feel real. Reconciling the Wonwoo he’s known until now with the ghoul in front of him is nearly impossible. He hasn’t given much thought to any humanity in ghouls, if such a thing can even exist.

He thinks of Hui’s gentle smile. _Humanity is the weakness of the CCG_. Can ghouls have the same kind of weaknesses? Is there anything human inside of them at all?

“If anyone else ends up dead, I’ll kill you myself,” Seungcheol finally says. Wonwoo doesn’t say anything, but there’s genuine relief on his face. His kagune presses into the ground and he launches himself into the air, landing on the roof of the dorm before sprinting out of sight. 

He calls in the report of the dead ghoul before heading back to the office. There’s a file on his desk, one he doesn’t remember bringing up from the records room. #717. 

When he opens it, he’s greeted by a grainy still from a security camera. Wonwoo’s profile. A list of his suspected involvement in human disappearances from five years ago. Someone has written in the margin of the paper: _Association with high ranking ghouls_? Next to his number, there is a neatly typed A. 

No, Seungcheol is sure that Wonwoo is S rank. With a kakuja like that…

He should update the record. This information is vital to the CCG. Going in blind is how investigators end up dead. In the end, he turns off the lights in his office for the first time in days and makes his way to the train station, back to his apartment. 

He takes the file home with him with the promise that he’ll update it later.

  
  


At the end of the week, Seungcheol gets on the train and goes to the Cochlea. He’s only been a few times in the course of his career. Once with Hui, once before Hyungwon was released from medical leave. The visit this time passes by in a blur, the mechanical way he tells Hyungwon about the university bloodbath, the questions fired off at #113, alias Minhyuk. The fact that he is more willing to speak to Hyungwon doesn’t bother him. It’s Hyungwon’s pet project, to gather information from the ghoul that almost killed him. Maybe Hyungwon finds it healing, staring at death through the thick paned glass and knowing he won.

The entire thing is a last ditch effort, anyway. The two ghouls responsible for the near extermination of the CCG, Rams Head and The Final One, feared even by S rank ghouls like #113, are unable to be located or stopped. _Stay out of their way_ , he said. _Keep a low profile_. Seungcheol will not close the case until the two ghouls are in the Cochlea or dead at his hands. Hui would do the same, _had_ done the same for his former partner until the CCG was attacked, when he’d come face to face with the two SS ranked ghouls and paid the ultimate price. 

He spends the rest of the afternoon thinking about the case. A thought pokes around at the back of his mind, the memory of the way #113 told Seungcheol exactly where to find Hyungwon, the way he held his hands easily in front of him, ready to be cuffed. _I’ll go quietly, but you can never tell anyone that I did._ Was that it? Was he living his own advice, staying out of the way by giving himself up? It seems impossible that a ghoul would be so afraid they would willingly turn themselves in. 

It’s not until he’s in bed that the rest of the conversation with #113 replays in his mind. 

_What do you know about #717_?

He can still see the spark of interest in his eyes, the amused tilt of his mouth when he answered, oh, _not as much as you, certainly_. 

Minhyuk’s words echo in his head, jumbled up with the sight of Wonwoo, reading with a coffee next to him the first time, when he slipped the cuffs on Jinyoung, when he found him behind the dorm, mouth stained with blood.

Just who is Wonwoo, really? If the policy of the CCG is that ghouls have no humanity, that they are bloodthirsty monsters who only want to eat and eat until there are no humans left, then how does that fit with the person Seungcheol has seen?

Sleep doesn’t come easy.

**♟♟♟**

There is a lot to keep him busy. Ghoul sightings, ghoul attacks, planning and coordinating with other wards. The work never stops. There is little time to celebrate the success of the university case coming to a close. There are claps on the shoulder, approving nods from his superiors, but there is also Wonwoo. They’ve only met a handful of times, barely said anything to each other in the grand scheme of things, but until now there had always been time to get to know more about him, to see where things might end up between them. To see if there was something between them at all. 

For weeks he dreams of him, sees Wonwoo at the cafe, cup filled with blood instead of coffee, teeth stained red. He sees Wonwoo’s kagune, his armored kakuja, imagines Wonwoo slamming his head into the concrete over and over until he wakes up with a start, breathless and covered in sweat.

He dreams of kissing him, of Wonwoo pinning him to the rough bricks of the dorms, sweet smile and bedroom eyes and on those mornings Seungcheol is breathless for a different reason entirely. He should probably talk to someone about it. The CCG has therapists on retainer, all confidential. He’s got to come to terms with who Wonwoo is, with _what_ he is. It’s hard. It’s harder because he’s not sure that he will ever be able to see Wonwoo as some mindless killing machine.

He still hasn’t updated his file, either.

Seungcheol doesn’t seek Wonwoo out so much as they literally run into each other. Seungcheol ends up on the sidewalk staring up at Wonwoo. He’s got a backpack slung over his shoulder, hair a mess, clothes rumpled and Seungcheol can’t tell if he’s leaving class or late for one. 

“I’m sorry,” he says softly, hesitating for only a moment before holding his hand out for Seungcheol. He takes it, heart lurching at how easily Wonwoo rights him, like he weighs nothing at all. 

“It’s my fault. I wasn’t paying attention,” Seungcheol says. Wonwoo turns to walk away and Seungcheol finds he doesn’t want him to go. “Wait. Do you have some time? Can I walk with you?”

Wonwoo visibly tenses. Seungcheol wonders what he must be thinking. Probably that Seungcheol has come to arrest him. Like now that Seungcheol knows what he is, he must be a target. Seungcheol is, of course, a little wary. Years of training have made him that way with humans and ghouls alike, but Wonwoo is different from anyone he’s met before. 

Wonwoo turns back to him, still so tense Seungcheol wants to reach out and work the tension away with hands on his shoulders. 

“Not like I really have a choice,” he mutters. He keeps walking and Seungcheol has to take a few long strides to catch up.

It’s an awkward, quiet walk. They haven’t seen each other since the night Seungcheol found him wrist deep in blood. He desperately wishes for something to fill the silence that isn’t _I can’t believe you’re a ghoul_.

This isn’t about any ongoing investigation, except that everything is about the investigation in one way or another. Seungcheol’s life since his first day at the Academy has been about ghouls. How to track them. How to kill them. How to keep them from killing him. Their habits, their mannerisms, their biology. Seungcheol knows more about ghouls than he does about his own inner workings, but when he looks at Wonwoo, there is no amount of training that prepared him for what he’s feeling.

He works very hard to shake it all from his mind. 

“You look exhausted,” Seungcheol says. “Classes going that badly?”

Wonwoo’s shoulders relax almost imperceptibly. Seungcheol ignores the victory cheer swooping his insides.

“It’s hard to sleep when you have student papers to grade, a thesis to write, and, you know, the looming threat of being found and murdered by the CCG.”

“I —” Seungcheol sighs, his shoe scraping loud against the sidewalk. “I didn’t come here to interrogate you. I didn't think I’d run into you at all, actually. Not after last time. But I’m glad I did.” He watches Wonwoo’s mouth twitch out of the corner of his eye. “I just wanted to see you.”

Wonwoo’s mouth keeps twitching, like he can’t decide what he wants to say, or maybe it’s that he doesn’t know how he wants to say it. They fall back into silence. Seungcheol watches the breeze blow flower petals across the grass, pinks and whites, the soft scent of pollen. 

“We hardly know each other,” Wonwoo murmurs, his voice almost lost to the breeze. “I know who you are, and you know what I am. What else is there, now?”

“Let’s pretend that I’m not a member of the CCG. Let’s pretend you’re just a Graduate student. In that universe, would you want to know more about me?” Seungcheol asks, though he feels his face go hot. He doesn’t know what he’s trying to say, but he hopes that Wonwoo understands. “Would you trust that I didn’t think you were a bad person, that I didn’t have bad intentions?”

Wonwoo’s file is sitting on his coffee table. He’s got it memorized, could probably recite it on the spot. Wonwoo’s birthday is in the middle of July. He’s only a year younger than Seungcheol. He volunteers at an animal shelter at the edge of the ward, particularly fond of the cats. He takes his coffee black, because he is a ghoul before he is anything else, and yet when Seungcheol looks at him he feels...something. Something he hasn’t felt in a long time. Wonwoo pinches the bridge of his nose and Seungcheol turns his head to look at him. 

“This is going to come back to bite me. Big time.” Wonwoo turns to face him, lips caught in a smirk. “But even in this universe, even knowing who you are, I’m still glad we ran into each other.” He lets out a small, harsh laugh. “It’s madness, is what it is. Grad school has turned my brain into mush.”

“Sounds like you’re speaking from experience. Have you ever,” Seungcheol starts, throat suddenly dry. He clears it and tries again. “Have you ever, uh, been with a human?”

Wonwoo’s lips twitch in a valiant attempt to suppress a laugh.

“I’m a ghoul, not an alien.” 

Seungcheol shoves at his shoulder, a far more casual touch that he should permit. “I know that. I just…” he trails off. He has to stare at the sidewalk, the way his shoes hit the concrete before he can speak again. “You don’t hear about a lot of relationships between ghouls and humans, not even friendships. Most would see it as some kind of betrayal.”

Wonwoo hums an agreement. “Probably. That doesn’t mean it never happens. I know plenty of ghouls that have dated humans, or at the very least been intimate with them.”

Seungcheol turns his head. Wonwoo’s side profile is just as striking as the rest of him, angular but soft, dark hair just hanging in his eyes. Seungcheol has seen Wonwoo red eyed and covered in gore, but he still wants to fix his bangs, run his hands through the hair at the nape of his neck. 

That’s what this is. He wants to kiss him. 

Wonwoo stops walking and Seungcheol takes two steps before he stops, too. 

“What? Do you think we don’t have the self-control for it? That we just smell a drop of blood and turn into bloodthirsty beasts?”

Seungcheol closes the distance between them, until he’s close enough to reach out and touch. If he wants. If he dares. 

“At the Academy, they teach us something like that,” Seungcheol murmurs. He lifts his hand and brings it to Wonwoo’s hair, tidying his bangs so they sit correctly. “They teach us that ghouls have no feelings, no humanity. Ghouls are monsters that take our shape.”

He lets his hand fall back to his side and meets Wonwoo’s eyes.

“I’m not so sure I believe that anymore.”

Wonwoo reaches for his hand, fingers looping carefully around his wrist. For a fraction of a second they stare at each other, Wonwoo’s eyes wide. He doesn’t decide to kiss him so much as his body moves all on its own, closing the gap between them and pressing their lips together. Wonwoo goes still, like he’s scared to move when all Seungcheol wants is for him to move, to come closer, to — 

Seungcheol winds his arms around Wonwoo’s neck and fits their mouths together more firmly. Wonwoo takes a sharp breath through his nose but finally kisses him back, hands careful as they come in contact with his waist. 

Kissing Wonwoo is like kissing anyone else. He doesn’t take like death, he doesn’t feel like ice, he’s just...a man. He doesn’t know how long they spend like that, seconds or hours, until someone wolf whistles at them across the lawn.

They break apart, and immediately there is an electric shock of guilt that hits his heart. A wrongness. He _can’t_ be doing this. Ghouls have taken so much from him. Things that he can never, ever get back. 

They weren’t Wonwoo, though, this new, quiet voice in his head reminds him. Ghouls are individuals just like humans are. He kisses Wonwoo again, just a press of lips this time. Wonwoo’s hands move up to cup his cheek, and like this he feels his heart flip. He wants to kiss him again. He never wants to stop.

“This is a terrible idea,” Wonwoo murmurs against his mouth, but he’s grinning. Seungcheol feels like his entire body is on fire. 

“What are you doing this weekend? Come to my place. We can talk more then. And you can think, too.” Seungcheol steps back, putting space between their bodies. They can both think. He’s got to _think_ clearly. His lips are tingling. “I wanted to kiss you, but let’s…” Seungcheol pulls out a business card from his pocket and scribbles his address on the back. “Think about it, okay? I’ll be home. Just ring the bell.”

Wonwoo takes the card, a content cat smile on his lips. “I’ll consider it. See you around, Officer.”

Seungcheol grins, turning around to yell back at him even as his feet keep him moving. “First Class Senior Investigator, actually.”

**♟♟♟**

The weekend comes and goes. Wonwoo doesn’t come to his apartment. They haven’t exchanged phone numbers, and short of tracking him down on campus Seungcheol has no way of getting in touch with him. 

It’s probably for the best, Seungcheol reasons Monday in the office. A human and a ghoul is already enough of a challenge, but Seungcheol is a member of the CCG. It’s his job to track and arrest ghouls, to kill them if necessary. Both of them kissing killers in their own eyes. It was doomed from the start. 

By Wednesday Seungcheol isn’t even sad about it. He takes Hyungwon to lunch. It’s easy, comfortable. Seungcheol considers for the first time since Hui’s death what it would be like to have a partner again. Hyungwon has been his friend for a long time. They’re the same rank now. Being his partner would be easy, but for some reason he can’t find the right way to ask. 

On Saturday Seungcheol drinks two bottles of soju and cries himself to sleep. It’s the first time he’s cried since the funeral. He thinks of Hui’s smile, his gentle hands and the ruthless efficiency of his kagune. The taste of his mouth. He thinks about how it could have been, if things had been different. If they had decided that one night could lead to two, to countless more. It’s sadness for the sake of sadness and nothing more. Tomorrow Seungcheol will wake up and know that everything happened just as it was meant to, that Hui was his partner, that they would not have worked as lovers. When he died something inside of Seungcheol fractured that will never be healed but it will mend, has already started. 

Weeks stretch into a month. In a coordinated effort with the 14th ward, the CCG takes down a ghoul operation on the border with less than five casualties. Seungcheol scans the faces of the dead and pretends he’s not looking for Wonwoo. He skips the offer to go out for celebratory drinks with the investigators and gets on the first train home instead. It starts raining just as he gets off the train, heavy drops that soak him through before he unlocks his door of his apartment. He pulls off his wet clothes and collapses into his bed, exhaustion bone deep.

He’s not sure how long he’s asleep when steady knocking wakes him. He throws on a pair of sweats and a plain white shirt, runs a hand through his hair in the hopes of looking somewhat presentable. He yawns as his fingers close around the doorknob. 

Seungcheol opens his door and Wonwoo is there, soaking wet from the rain that continues to pour down. It’s so unexpected Seungcheol has to grab the door frame to steady himself. He didn’t think he would ever see him again.

“Can I come in?” Wonwoo pants. He must have run from the train all the way here. 

Seungcheol doesn’t answer, just pulls him inside and slams the door shut behind him. His body is buzzing, and everything still feels like a dream. Wonwoo’s hair is a little curly from the rain, his glasses dotted with moisture. 

“I’m sorry,” Wonwoo starts right away, glancing at Seungcheol’s eyes and then down somewhere near his neck. “I had to —”

“Later,” Seungcheol says, cutting him off.

He closes the distance between them, presses Wonwoo against the door and kisses him, hand snaking into his hair. Wonwoo makes a soft, surprised sound in the back of his throat before his hand comes up to cup his face, thumb rubbing absently at his cheek. Kissing him feels better than good, like the month of trying not to think about him was worth something after all. Wonwoo pulls him closer, Seungcheol’s shirt sticking to Wonwoo’s wet one. It turns heated fast, relief and want flowing urgently through his veins. Wonwoo’s hands work their way under his shirt just as Seungcheol licks into his mouth. 

There is a part of Seungcheol that doesn’t even care Wonwoo is still wearing shoes. He wants him, is really not opposed to dropping to his knees right here in the entryway. Wonwoo, at least, seems to be the more rational of the two. He breaks the kiss and rests his head against the door, panting softly. He slips his shoes off and kicks them to the side of the door, watching Seungcheol with a long simmering kind of hunger, as impatient looking as Seungcheol feels. 

“Bedroom?” Seungcheol asks. He takes Wonwoo’s hand in his own hesitantly. He’s bracing for the no, for the rejection he’s been expecting since Wonwoo ditched him all those weeks ago. 

“Please,” he answers, squeezing their linked fingers. Seungcheol’s heart slams hard against his ribcage, and he leads Wonwoo down the hall.

It’s slower, here. There is still bone-deep want (he doesn’t think that will ever go away), but Seungcheol takes the time to kiss Wonwoo easy and slow, to peel his soaking wet shirt over his head. He shivers when it’s gone and Seungcheol pulls him closer. 

“Wow,” Seungcheol can’t help but murmur, his eyes taking in Wonwoo’s exposed skin. All lean muscle and sharp planes. Seungcheol wants to sink his teeth into his shoulder. 

Wonwoo smiles, pleased, before tugging at Seungcheol’s shirt. “You, too.”

He lets Wonwoo pull the soft cotton over his head, lets him look, too. It’s only fair. His fingers reach out and spread across the planes of his chest, down and down until Wonwoo’s fingers slip inside the waistband of his pants. Seungcheol steps closer, presses skin to skin and kisses him again. Wonwoo opens up for him right away, and this time it’s him walking backward, pulling Seungcheol with him onto the bed. 

He settles in Wonwoo’s lap, knees on either side of his hips. Like this he can feel Wonwoo half hard against him. He kisses him and everything edges on urgent again, Seungcheol desperate for Wonwoo to touch him, to — 

He says, “Fuck me,” at the same time Wonwoo asks, “Can I fuck you?” and he laughs under his breath, climbing off Wonwoo’s lap and relaxing against the mattress. 

Wonwoo stares at him, eyes dark, brown tinged just a little red. Seungcheol slides his sweatpants down before Wonwoo has even moved, his cock half hard, twitching in the air when Wonwoo’s eyes zero in on him. Seungcheol lets him stare as long as he can, but desire runs hot, desperation winning out. 

“You, too,” he says. “Everything you need is in the drawer.”

Wonwoo blinks like he’s snapped out of a trance. He nods absently, stands and pulls off the rest of his wet clothes. Seungcheol almost whistles at him. Wonwoo is gorgeous, all wide shoulders and small waist, the v of his hips, his cock, hard and heavy between his legs. Seungcheol wants him so bad he can taste it.

Wonwoo finds the lube and condoms and tosses them next to Seungcheol’s knee before he settles on top of him, rolling his hips down as he connects their lips again. Seungcheol groans, hips matching his rhythm. He curls their tongues together and Seungcheol’s hand wanders to Wonwoo’s hip, urging him faster, the friction of their bodies sending pleasure molten through his veins.

By the time they break apart, Wonwoo’s hand is around his cock, stroking over him slowly in the space between their bodies. He kisses a line down Seungcheol’s neck, pauses to nip at the place where neck meets shoulder. Seungcheol keens, hips bucking up into Wonwoo’s hand. He can feel the smile as Wonwoo works his way down. He settles between his legs and slows his hand on his cock, leveling his eyes with Seungcheol’s. 

“I want to suck you off,” he says. Seungcheol bites his lip because suddenly it’s the only thing he wants, too. He nods quickly, and Wonwoo grins, leaning down to take the head of his cock into his mouth.

“ _Fuck_ ,” Seungcheol groans, keeping his hips still by force of will alone. Wonwoo sinks lower right away, taking half of his cock into his mouth all at once. It’s amazing, hot and wet and so good Seungcheol wonders if he’ll be able to last until the fucking. 

It’s here, Wonwoo’s mouth around him, mind hazy with pleasure, that Seungcheol realizes Wonwoo asked him because he’s a ghoul, because there is eating him and then there is _eating him_. It should worry him, probably, but the time for fear passed when they kissed against his front door. Wonwoo bobs his head, sinks down until he’s taken Seungcheol to the back of his throat and he shudders. He glances up through his lashes and Seungcheol feels his orgasm ebb closer, desire pooling low, cock pulsing with each swipe of Wonwoo’s tongue. 

Wonwoo comes off him with a soft sound, hand taking the place of his mouth lazily. Seungcheol feels electrified, his body tight with desire. 

“You look good like this,” Wonwoo says. He takes his hand off Seungcheol long enough to slick up his fingers before he resumes his maddening pace. “You taste good, too.”

Seungcheol chews on his lip, canting his hips into Wonwoo’s hand.

“Next time,” he says, “let’s switch. I’ve been told I give great head.”

Wonwoo grins, fingers ghosting over his entrance. “Oh? Better than me?”

“Won’t know unless we try,” Seungcheol answers. Wonwoo slides a finger inside and he moans, rolling his hips against him impatiently. “I want to watch you. Next time.”

Wonwoo hums, working his finger slowly before giving in and sliding a second finger inside. 

“Do I get to come in your mouth?”

Seungcheol shudders as Wonwoo’s fingers slide deeper and curl up, searching. 

“You can come wherever you want,” he says, and it’s then that Wonwoo finds what he’s looking for. Seungcheol curses, hands twisting in the sheets. Wonwoo smiles, something just this side of hungry, and works his fingers faster, grazing that spot inside of him just to keep him on edge. 

“Okay, okay,” Seungcheol says, reaching for Wonwoo’s hand and taking it off his cock. “I’m ready.”

“Are you sure?” Wonwoo asks, slipping the tip of a third finger inside of him. Seungcheol throws his head back and moans. “I don’t want to hurt you. You aren’t as strong as a ghoul.”

“Are you planning to fuck me so hard you break something?” Seungcheol asks, his heart beating just a little faster.

Fundamentally, he knows that Wonwoo is strong. Even low ranking ghouls are double the strength of humans. It’s thrilling and scary in equal parts.

“I’ll be gentle. Promise.”

Wonwoo takes his fingers out of Seungcheol and wipes them on the sheets. The tip of his dick is shiny with precum, like he’s gotten worked up just from pleasuring Seungcheol. It’s a lot to take in. He rolls the condom on and slicks himself up with lube. He presses on the backs of Seungcheol’s thighs and lines himself up, glancing up to meet his eyes as he starts to push in. 

It’s not earth-shattering. Seungcheol expected it to hit him, that Wonwoo is a ghoul, that they are doing something very taboo, but nothing like that comes at all. Instead, it’s just sex, slow and easy, Wonwoo working himself in carefully. He keeps his eyes on Seungcheol the whole time. It’s intense. It’s sexy. Seungcheol waits for him to bottom out before he reaches for him, pulling him down into a kiss that Wonwoo accepts hungrily. 

He loses himself to the taste of Wonwoo on his tongue, heat buzzing through him more pleasantly. Wonwoo’s hand comes up to cup his cheek. It’s nice, gentle and grounding, somehow, pulls Seungcheol back to the present. Wonwoo pulls out half way and eases back inside. It’s good, and Seungcheol moans into his mouth, rocking his hips as he chases the feeling. 

“It’s ok?” Wonwoo breaks the kiss to ask.

Seungcheol nods, thinks better of it, says, “Yeah, _god_ , it’s good, you can move, _please_ —”

And Wonwoo doesn’t let him finish, props up on his hands and gets to work. He pulls out until the tip of his cock is all that’s left inside, thrusts in as deep as he can go. Seungcheol feels like he’s floating, Wonwoo’s cock filling him up, hitting places inside of him he didn’t even know could feel good. 

“ _Fuck_ ,” Wonwoo pants. He slams a little harder into Seungcheol, with enough force that he moves up the bed. He’s being so careful. Seungcheol doesn’t know how to tell him that he can do whatever he wants, that he’s not going to break. Maybe he can’t find the words because he doesn't know what will happen if he says them.

Instead, Seungcheol murmurs out, “Feels so good.” 

Wonwoo smirks down at him and picks up the pace, still far more careful than Seungcheol would be if their positions were reversed. He gets up on his knees, shifts Seungcheol’s hips, and _there_.

Seungcheol gasps, pleasure crackling up his spine. Wonwoo is relentless, stroking across that spot inside him with each thrust. 

“Harder, please,” Seungcheol pants, chewing his bottom lip. “I need more, I trust you, just, _please_.”

Wonwoo sighs, the corner of his mouth pulled up, exasperated. Seungcheol wants to kiss him. 

“You’ll tell me if it’s too much, right?”

Seungcheol nods, and Wonwoo gives him one experimental thrust. The force of it nearly takes his breath away, pleasure immediate, coursing hot and heavy through him. He twists his hands in the sheets, moaning openly. “God, yes.” 

Wonwoo does it again, one rough thrust, before he finally sets a rhythm, pounding into him until Seungcheol’s vision goes staticy. Wonwoo shudders, hands tight against his waist. 

“You’re so good,” Wonwoo says. “God, you feel —”

“You too,” Seungcheol pants, cutting him off. He’s so close he can taste it. He snakes a hand around his cock, stroking in time with Wonwoo’s thrusts.

“Yeah, god, that’s hot,” Wonwoo says. “I wanna see you come.”

Seungcheol wants the same thing. He rubs his thumb over the head of his cock at the same time Wonwoo glides across his prostate. Their eyes are locked, Wonwoo watching him like he is the only thing in the entire world. Everything is so intense. It takes two more strokes and with Wonwoo buried deep inside of him he comes, spilling hot over his hand. 

He comes so hard his ears are ringing. Wonwoo works him through it, leans down and kisses him, all tongue and teeth. His stomach rubs against Seungcheol’s cock, aftershocks running up his spine until it’s almost too much. 

With their mouths still connected he slams into Seungcheol faster, harder, chasing his own release. Seungcheol is desperate for it too. He breaks the kiss, sucks a dark mark under Wonwoo’s jaw. 

“You, too,” he says. He rakes blunt nails down Wonwoo’s back. His eyes turn, black with blood red pupils and he comes with a gasp. Seungcheol pulls him into a kiss even before he finishes. He wants it, and it feels important, though he’s not really sure why. 

Instead of collapsing on top of him, Wonwoo pulls out and rolls onto his side. Seungcheol turns over too, mirroring him. They’re both covered in come, though he can hardly find the effort to care. 

“That was…” Seungcheol starts. Wonwoo’s eyes are still red. He wonders how long it will take for them to go back to normal. It’s not as unnerving as it should be. 

“Yeah. It really was,” Wonwoo finishes. He’s got a soft, gentle smile on his face. Seungcheol’s heart keeps flipping in his chest. He’s falling, hard and fast and he’s going to hit the ground, splatter against the concrete. He doesn’t care about that, either.

They lay there for a while, enjoying the come down. Seungcheol reaches out and plays with Wonwoo’s fingers, lacing them with his own, tracing the tips of them. 

“Shower?” Seungcheol asks. He stretches, arching his back and working the soreness from his muscles. It’s not the day he expected, but he’s glad for the way it turned out. When he rolls out of bed he holds a hand out for Wonwoo. 

“I just had to make sure,” Wonwoo says after, finally finishing what he was trying to say when he first got to Seungcheol’s apartment. His hair is still wet from the shower, and Seungcheol has to fight the urge to towel dry it himself. “A ghoul and a human. There’s a lot of variables.”

“After a week I thought you’d given up on me,” he says softly. Wonwoo reaches out for him, hands tangling together under the sheet. “And I tried to be okay with it, but honestly, I hated it. I wanted to see you. I always want to see you.” He presses a kiss to Wonwoo’s mouth. “I want to know you. I want to be with you.”

Wonwoo’s eyebrow quirks at that. “Yeah? Be with me how?”

 _You know how_ , Seungcheol almost says, but that’s not fair. If there’s anything he’s learned in his life, it’s that even the people closest to you don’t always know what you’re thinking. It’s better to say it.

“Do you want to, uh,” Seungcheol starts, heat creeping up his face. “Would you like to, with me — ”

Wonwoo smiles, soft and fond and there’s warmth in his eyes like the first beams of sunrise.

“Are you asking me to be your boyfriend?”

Seungcheol has thought about it nonstop since their first kiss, weighed it on a scale, what he would gain and what he would lose. He’s quiet for long enough that uncertainty creeps its way across Wonwoo’s face, the light dimming down in his eyes, a crease between his brows.

He leans forward and kisses him, and it is good and right and everything Seungcheol has ever wanted. 

“Yeah,” he says when they break apart. “I guess I am.”

Wonwoo flops back against the pillow, his hands settling behind his head, and he grins. 

“We’re both very busy. Work. School. Are you sure you want to add me to the mix?”

“You can stay over whenever you want,” Seungcheol says. “I’ll do my best to make as much time for you as I can. I really like you. I want to do this.”

“I know,” Wonwoo says, hand sliding over Seungcheol’s waist. “It’s just nice to hear it.”

They’re quiet for a long time, so long Seungcheol is sure Wonwoo has fallen asleep. Then he feels a hand in his hair, almost reassuring.

“It’s the same for me,” Wonwoo says softly, and it feels like Wonwoo has made a permanent space for himself in Seungcheol’s chest.

Seungcheol slings a leg across Wonwoo’s hips, his face pressed to the crook of his neck, and for the first time in months he falls into a restful, dreamless sleep. 

**♟♟♟**

The weeks come and go. Seungcheol goes to work and a few people comment on how much happier he seems. Does he have a special someone? He doesn’t say anything. Let them talk. Wonwoo isn’t a secret, exactly, but Seungcheol hasn’t decided how to put words to what they are. He has a file, after all. Some intern has probably memorized each one, would take one look at Wonwoo and run screaming.

Being with Wonwoo is comfortable, even during dinners where Wonwoo does nothing but drink coffee and make faces at Seungcheol’s pasta.

“It smells bad,” Wonwoo says, like he needs to give an explanation. 

_You’re a ghoul_ , Seungcheol thinks, _of course it smells bad_.

“Have you ever tried it?” Seungcheol asks, taking a sip of wine. 

Wonwoo visibly pales at that, setting his coffee down on the table with a soft sound. He’s quiet, and Seungcheol finds himself unable to take another bite.

“Of course I have,” Wonwoo says quietly. He looks up at Seungcheol, eyes clouded over. “You grow up knowing what you are, what it takes for you to survive, but that doesn’t mean you don’t have to try it for yourself.” There’s a bittersweet smile on his face. “First was pizza. I figured, hey, it’s popular so it has to be good. I don’t even think I managed to swallow it.”

Wonwoo takes a hasty sip of his coffee, eyes trailing down to the table. Seungcheol’s kitchen feels too small and too big all at once. 

“So then I thought, well, rice is plain. They feed it to sick people, so maybe that will work. I at least managed to make it from the restaurant to my apartment before I got sick.”

Seungcheol reaches out for Wonwoo’s hand, lacing their fingers together over the table. He’s never given much thought to it, but for a moment he imagines a world where things are reversed, where humans are exterminated simply for surviving. Predators are not wiped off the earth for hunting prey in nature. And yet…

“I’m sorry,” Seungcheol says, but it doesn’t feel like enough. Wonwoo shakes his head, tracing his thumb over Seungcheol’s hand.

“I hated what I was, once. I don’t hate being a ghoul, Seungcheol, but that doesn’t mean I don’t wish things were different.”

“Me too. I mean that.”

Seungcheol squeezes Wonwoo’s hand. There is so much he wants to know about the ghoul in front of him. Everything. Anything. He leans over the table and kisses Wonwoo’s cheek, the tip of his nose. 

“So, what’s your favorite color?” he asks with a grin.

Wonwoo blinks. “My...purple.”

Seungcheol hums. He stands and pulls Wonwoo up with him, leading him down the hall to his bedroom.

“What’s your favorite book series?”

Wonwoo gives him a soft, fond smile. “Sherlock Holmes.”

Seungcheol walks backward until his knees touch the mattress, falling on his back and pulling Wonwoo on top of him.

“What’s your favorite food?”

Wonwoo’s eyes flash red, the whites tinged with black. He slides his leg between Seungcheol’s thighs, letting out a satisfied hum when his breath hitches. 

His teeth graze the side of Seungcheol’s neck and he keens.

“ _You_ ,” Wonwoo murmurs against his skin, and Seungcheol sees stars.

Later, after they’ve cleaned up and moved back to the living room, Seungcheol finds himself hungry to know more. He could know everything about Wonwoo and it wouldn’t be enough. Wonwoo is equally as curious about him, favorite animal, favorite movie, favorite flower all answered in gasps with Wonwoo’s fingers inside of him. 

“What was your longest relationship?” Seugcheol asks. 

Wonwoo’s leg bumps his gently. “I’ll tell you mine if you tell me yours.”

“Fair. Okay,” Seungcheol says. “A year. She transferred to another ward. Dating among the CCG is hard enough with work, but that kind of distance...it was mutual. She texts me sometimes. Her name is Sunmi. I...she taught me a lot about my job. About love, too.”

Wonwoo looks at him for a long time before grinning. “Was she hot?”

Seungcheol laughs. “So sexy. I’ll pull her up on SNS sometime. Some days I almost feel like I dreamed the whole thing.”

Wonwoo leans against him and takes a breath. 

“It was a lot more casual, but I saw someone a few times. I think there was potential for it to turn into something more, but what Changgu wanted when we met and what he wanted the last time we fucked...it was like he changed into a completely different person.”

Seungcheol pulls back, hands flying to Wonwoo’s shoulders. “Wait. Wait. Stop.” Wonwoo closes his mouth, eyes locked with his. “You mean to tell me that you... _slept with_ one of the most dangerous ghouls the CCG has ever known?”

Wonwoo’s cheeks flush, his eyes drifting down to where their legs touch on the couch. “He wasn’t always like that, believe me. He was just Changgu then. A lot like me.” Seungcheol has no idea what face he’s making but Wonwoo frowns, lip stuck out in almost a pout. “Before things with Hongseok got out of hand, he had an office job. He did everything in his power to blend in and live a normal life. Besides, it wasn’t some drawn out affair. It was like three times.”

“Three,” Seungcheol deadpans. Three. _Three times_.

Wonwoo sighs, so close to rolling his eyes Seungcheol almost laughs. “Yeah. Three. And then I found a severed hand on my doorstep. I moved. I enrolled in university. Maybe a year later I found out Rams Head and The Final One were on the CCG’s most wanted list.” He places his hands over Seungcheol’s, pulls them from his shoulders and into his lap. “I just want to finish my degree, keep my head down, blend in. I don’t want any trouble. Not from them, and not from the CCG.”

In some ways, Seungcheol gets it. Wonwoo wants a normal life, one that he was denied just by being born what he is. He wonders, not for the first time, how many ghouls there must be that live alongside humans, that ration their kills or scavenge enough to go undetected their whole lives. What it must be like to live on the fringes of humanity, never truly being able to let your guard down. 

He squeezes Wonwoo’s hands in his. 

“I’m not going to let the CCG cause you any trouble. You have someone on the inside now,” Seungcheol says, pressing a quick kiss to Wonwoo’s mouth. “Just keep doing what you’re doing, and I promise I’ll do what I can to keep the Doves away from you.”

He’s never called his own people Doves before. It feels a little like a line in the sand, like, more than bringing Wonwoo into his life, this is the thing he can never take back. 

Wonwoo’s eyes flash, determination, red tinged brown. “Same for me. No one gets to lay a finger on you without paying for it.”

He can take care of himself, but Seungcheol feels protectiveness wrap around him, heavy, like the first time he put on his trench coat. He pulls him in for a kiss, urgent but simmering. Seungcheol hasn’t said it but he feels it, love as strong and bloody as the ghoul it’s aimed for.

**♟♟♟**

Seungcheol has been inside the Cochlea for ten minutes and he has already seen more death than he has in his entire career. Bodies litter the floor, human and ghoul alike, the air metallic with blood. Their orders are to contain as many prisoners as possible until power is restored and the cells can be locked down again. Ghouls are not injected with Rc suppressants unless they use their kagunes, so while many prisoners are out of practice, they are by no means powerless. Seungcheol makes his way down one of many curved corridors, quinque in hand. His trench coat is gone, long forgotten when some ghoul used it to fling him against the wall. The ghoul is dead, and the dark pants and button down make him feel a little more concealed than the beacon his trench coat had been. 

He comes around the curve and is face to face with #929. He’s got an arm around Jaebum, #106. Both of them are bleeding, both have crimson mouths, though Jinyoung is making a face like he’s eaten something disgusting. Desperate times and all that. Seungcheol tightens his grip on his quinque and heads right for them, slashing at the place their bodies touch, forcing them apart. Jaebum growls, kagune flowing out and clanging against Seungcheol’s weapon. He can hear Jinyoung coming up behind him, the soft, insistent press of his rage. 

“You’re not going anywhere,” Seungcheol grits, pressing harder into Jaebum before ducking just as Jinyoung’s kagune flies through the place where his head was. 

The two share a look between him, striking at the same time, perfect coordination. Seungcheol has nowhere to go. He dodges Jaebum’s piercing strike only to get grazed by Jinyoung. It’s a miracle, really. Seungcheol can feel the way his kagune is hardened at the tip, like a blade as it scrapes the skin of his bicep. 

“You again,” Jaebum says, eyes pitch black. He flips backward and lands on his feet a few meters away. “Did you find your killer, Mister Dove? I told you we had nothing to do with that.”

“You killed a girl right in front of me,” Seungcheol counters, dodging another attack from Jinyoung before turning to face him. The clang of their weapons colliding makes his teeth ache. “You deserve to be in here.”

“I don’t think so,” Jinyoung says lowly. He rushes Seungcheol, pointed kagune aimed straight for his chest. Seungcheol raises his quinque to deflect and just manages to steer him off course, the point stabbing lightly and dragging across his side. Blood rushes. He gasps, barely fighting off the urge to cradle his stomach. 

“We’re getting out of here,” Jinyoung continues, walking over to Jaebum. He brings the tip of his kagune to his face and sniffs at Seungcheol’s blood before licking some of it off.

Jaebum grins, something secret and wicked that has Seungcheol’s hackles rising. 

“He likes you, Dove. I’d watch out if I were you. You seem to have a knack for making powerful enemies.”

Seungcheol holds his hand over his bleeding side, raising his quinque in front of him again. He considers it. Charging them. One valiant effort. It’s a death sentence, but just then the power comes back on, cell doors slamming shut all around them. 

“Let’s go,” Jinyoung says, lacing their fingers together with a final look back at Seungcheol. He should go after them. A wave of pain stings his side. He hisses, pressing his palm against the wound again, and by the time he looks up the two are gone. 

There’s no time to think about what Jaebum meant by powerful enemies. He wonders if he means Rams Head and The Final One. If they don’t know Seungcheol is after them yet they will find out eventually. The last time they wanted a member of the CCG they raided headquarters, left carnage behind and nothing but Hui’s necklace to confirm which body was his.

It’s not until he makes his way back to the atrium that he thinks about Wonwoo, and it’s so much that he falls to his knees in the carnage around him. He hasn’t talked to Wonwoo all day, work keeping him busy and then the emergency notification that brought him here. If he died…

Seungcheol doesn’t want to think about it, but all he can imagine is the pale grief on Wonwoo’s face, the speed his eyes would turn black, like watching storm clouds roll in. His kakuja, plated and undocumented. Just who would he blame, when it was all said and done?

His knees are soaked with blood by the time he gets to his feet again, side twinging in protest, and keeps walking until he makes it to the center of the atrium. Hyungwon looks like he’s been put through the wringer. There’s blood on his throat, his arm wrapped tightly around Miyeon’s waist like he’s afraid one or both of them will fall over. The ghouls that have escaped are a small number compared to those recaptured or killed, but it does little to brighten the atmosphere. 

He wants to hug him, hug them both. They are injured but alive. So many are dead. But not them. Not today.

Seungcheol calls Wonwoo on his way to the hospital. It’s barely a conversation. _Hospital. No. Just a scratch, really. I’m okay. I’ll call you later._ It’s a quick thing. Stitches, which sting worse than the kagune that injured him. The doctor gives him antibiotics and painkillers and sends him on his way. The whole affair seems anticlimactic, like he got off too easily even though it’s a miracle any of them survived at all. 

When he opens the door to his apartment Wonwoo is there. They exchanged keys a few weeks ago, and really, Seungcheol is relieved to see him. He’s bruised all over, stomach burning now that the local anesthetic has worn off. He wants to collapse into bed. He wants — 

“It was all over the news,” Wonwoo whispers. He closes the distance between them and wraps Seungcheol in his arms. “You scared the shit out of me. I thought something, I was so…”

Seungcheol’s arms find their way around his waist. He holds him tight. He should say, _so many ghouls died tonight, but not you. Never you._

But he doesn’t.

“I’m tougher than I look,” Seungcheol says instead, smiling against Wonwoo’s neck. “I know how to keep myself alive.”

Wonwoo reaches for his face and guides him into a kiss, the gentlest press of lips. “Who was it?”

Wonwoo’s hands tremble almost imperceptibly against his skin. There’s something else in the question, something unspoken, unsaid. 

“That Gourmet from the university. #929. They escaped during the chaos. Intent to kill, but I’m better than he gave me credit for.”

“If I ever see him again I promise you I’ll make him regret it.”

Seungcheol huffs, rubbing Wonwoo’s sides in an effort to soothe him. “I’m fine. It’s really nothing.”

Wonwoo lets him go and steps back, surveys him all over. A look crosses his face, something almost sad, before he laces their fingers together. 

“Come on. Let’s get you to bed.”

Wonwoo helps him undress. He doesn’t really need it, but it’s kind of nice to be fussed over. His hands run over his exposed skin, lingering near the large white bandage covering his stitches. Seungcheol links their fingers again, brings Wonwoo’s hand to his mouth and presses a kiss to the back of it. 

They spend a long time kissing, drinking each other in. Seungcheol is sure Wonwoo must be feeling the same. So many dead. But not you.

“I love you,” Seungcheol whispers against Wonwoo’s mouth between kisses. Wonwoo’s eyes go wide, a hurried _I love you too_ , before Seungcheol tugs Wonwoo on top of him, arching up against the sting of his stitches just to feel their bodies press together. There are not enough hours in a lifetime for how much he wants to feel Wonwoo just like this.

**♟♟♟**

The stitches come out after a week. Seungcheol is barred from work for three weeks, even amid the chaos of finding a new Commissioner. He spends a lot of time watching the news, probably more than he should, Wonwoo grading papers or working on his thesis next to him when he can. 

They’re at Wonwoo’s flat, this time. It’s on the outskirts of the ward, apartment complex tucked away between townhouses and a residential development. One night there is a hint of them in a follow up report on the evening news. _The SS ranked ghouls are the CCG’s Most Wanted and believed to be behind the planned break out of more than 50 ghouls from the Cochlea_. They don’t say their names. There’s no need to. 

Wonwoo goes impossibly still next to him on the couch. 

“What’s wrong?” Seungcheol asks, rubbing Wonwoo’s thigh with his foot. 

“Do they...really think it was them? Is that who the CCG is looking for?”

Seungcheol sighs. Wonwoo’s...history with Changgu is still hard for him to wrap his head around, but he knows it’s more than that. They aren’t SS ranked for nothing, and if this was some kind of planned assault, there will be more bloodshed until they get whoever it is they’re after. 

“This isn’t really their style,” Seugcheol answers. “From what I can get Hyungwon to tell me, it seems like #113, uh, Minhyuk, had some people on the outside who orchestrated the thing. The goal was to get him out, but of course the ghouls inside took advantage of the situation.”

“You can hardly blame them,” Wonwoo says, his tone suddenly sharp. Seungcheol’s eyes go wide. “How many of the ghouls in there are actually criminals? How many are locked up for life just for satisfying a biological need?”

It renders Seungcheol a little speechless. There is no other option for ghouls aside from eating their own kind. It’s human beings or starvation. He wonders if, in the past, he would have slapped cuffs on Wonwoo so easily, if any thought about his actions being good or bad would cross his mind at all.

“I know that,” Seungcheol says softly. He does, but he doesn’t know how to convince Wonwoo. “I know who you are, what you are, and I still want to be with you.”

They are quiet for a long time, the news changing to some drama that Seungcheol half pays attention to. He spends more time watching Wonwoo’s profile out of the corner of his eye, the way the lamp hits his face, makes him glow. 

Is this a fight? It feels a little bit like one, like he should apologize. The problem is he doesn’t know what exactly he’s done wrong. 

It’s later, tucked into Wonwoo’s small bed, that he mentions it again.

“What if it were me?” Wonwoo asks. “Would you lock me up if I ate more often?”

Seungcheol sighs. “That’s not fair. I love you. I don’t want you to starve, and I know what that means.”

“And what about your work? Your friends? Would you tell them about me?”

“Where is this coming from?”

Wonwoo bites his lip and looks away. Seungcheol wants to reach out and touch him, but he’s afraid that if he does, something will happen that they cannot take back. So he waits, watches Wonwoo’s face in the darkness as he works through what it is he wants to say. 

“I just,” Wonwoo starts, voice barely a whisper between them. “You could have _died_ , Seungcheol. Every day you spend at work is another day where some high ranked ghoul could string you up and eat you piece by piece. It’s a lot of things.” He sighs and moves closer to Seungcheol, palm sliding over his waist. “I knew this was going to be hard, but...sometimes it feels impossible.”

Seungcheol’s heart squeezes in his chest. _But I love you_ , he thinks. _That can be enough_.

“One day at a time. I know it’s cliche to say it that way, but I love you.” Seungcheol moves closer too, until they’re touching from chest to feet. He presses a kiss to Wonwoo’s neck. “I know what I do is dangerous, but you’re in just as much danger. It’s scary as hell. I go to crime scenes and scan for you, pray you’re not among the dead. And you’re right, it’s hard.” He kisses a line up to Wonwoo’s mouth, pouring as much of his heart in it as he can. “You’re worth it. I want to make this work. As long as you want it too, we’ll figure it out.”

Wonwoo kisses him back, an answer, or maybe an apology, and as Seungcheol drifts to sleep he reaches for Wonwoo’s hand in the darkness and hooks their pinky fingers together.

When he leaves the next morning something makes Seungcheol wary. Wonwoo seems better, he kisses him goodbye, but there’s a prickling in the base of his skull that he can’t seem to shake. A week goes by and he doesn’t hear a word from him. Thesis work aside, it makes Seungcheol more anxious. Since they’ve been together, Wonwoo has never been the type to leave him hanging like this. It reminds him of the month it took Wonwoo to finally show up at his apartment. Like he’s thinking about something. 

On Sunday Wonwoo unlocks Seungcheol’s door and lets himself in. He looks like he hasn’t slept since the last time they saw each other, dark circles and messy hair. He looks paler, too, a little like he’s lost weight. 

“I’m sorry,” Wonwoo says. He melts into Seungcheol’s hug, trembling against him slightly. He runs his fingers through his hair. “I just, I had to think about some things.”

Seungcheol pulls back, fear like a rock in the pit of his stomach. 

“And?”

“I love you,” Wonwoo says. His pupils are blown, dark black swallowing the brown of his iris. “I think we should take a break.”

It’s almost freeing, hearing it out loud. Seungcheol has been waiting since their almost fight for the other shoe to drop.

“You’re right. It’s not fair to ask you to choose me over the CCG, but sometimes I want to. I want to know how you can say that you love me when you go out and kill ghouls.” Wonwoo’s shoulders are shaking. He takes a deep breath. “I know what I signed up for, and I want to make this work, but I just...I need some time.”

Seungcheol feels numb. It’s not real. This can’t be happening. 

“I don’t, a _break_?” Seungcheol manages to stutter out. “Why can’t we figure this out together? I’m sorry if I upset you. I don’t —”

Wonwoo holds up a hand. “Please don’t. Don’t say that you’re sorry when you’re not.”

“You’re asking me to change my _entire life_ for you,” Seungcheol says, numbness replaced slowly with anger, simmering. “And what about you? Already doing things under the radar so there’s nothing for you to fix, is that it? You know it’s not fair but you want me to do it anyway. Do you think I like being on the front lines of a war? Do you think I enjoy walking in to work and not knowing if I’m going to be eaten alive?”

Wonwoo’s eyes harden, shoulders straightening as the words sink in. 

“I think you _do_ like it,” Wonwoo says, voice icy. “You could find another job, but I think you don’t want to. I think you like being the hero too much.”

“You don’t know _anything_ ,” Seungcheol fires back, hands balled into fists at his sides. “You have no idea the things I’ve done for you. I’ve risked _so much_ for you.”

Wonwoo deflates even as Seungcheol expects venom. His heart feels twisted, painful knots that bleed and bleed. Wonwoo looks no better. The silence between them is deafening. Seungcheol can hear his blood rush loud in his ears. 

“A break,” Wonwoo says, final. “I think we both need to figure out what we’re willing to compromise on.” He turns around and walks to the door. “Don’t contact me unless something major changes. I —”

“I’m sorry,” Seungcheol rushes out, anger evaporating in a wave of sadness, reality crashing down around him. “I shouldn’t have snapped at you like that. Wonwoo, please, I —”

 _Love you_. The words catch in his throat as Wonwoo turns back to him with a soft, sad smile. 

“I love you too. Don’t ever forget that.”

“Wonwoo, _don’t_ —”

But he’s gone, the door clicking shut behind him.

The urge to chase after him is immediate, but Seungcheol can’t move. He’s frozen, struck with something not unlike grief, like the way everything froze when Hui’s necklace settled against the palm of his hand. _This is all that’s left of him_.

Seungcheol sinks to his knees on the wood floor. He wraps his hands around his stomach, desperate to hold himself together, keep everything inside where it belongs. He takes a breath, and then another, squeezes his eyes shut and tries to get the taste of Wonwoo’s skin out of his mouth.

But a break is never clean, and the jagged pieces rip him open. He folds in on himself and lets silent tears trail down his cheeks.

**♟♟♟**

Seungcheol’s first day back at work finds him slapped with a heavy promotion. Special Class Investigator. For his contributions to humanity. Guilt pangs in the new scar on his stomach. The title tastes acrid on his tongue, like a lie. Like betrayal. A little like Wonwoo’s name.

There are days he wants to text Wonwoo, wants to get mad, ask him what he really expected to happen. The CCG is flawed, he’s acutely aware of that, but he cannot leave his entire life behind. Not for one man. Not for one ghoul. None of it is fair. Seungcheol is expected to overlook that Wonwoo’s survival is hinged on eating human beings, but Wonwoo can’t overlook this one thing for him? 

It’s just a break, just some time to figure things out, but it feels more permanent than that. He doesn’t ask for his key back, a small, bleak hope that things will work out. Wonwoo never asks for his, either.

Seungcheol would never let anything happen to him. He has to know that, right? There are terrible ghouls who kill for fun, there are ghouls who binge eat entire apartment complexes, there are even ghouls who run gourmet human auctions, prime cuts to the highest bidder.

And then there is Wonwoo, but Seungcheol still doesn’t know how he could explain that to anyone who might ask.

In the months that follow, Hyungwon is named Commissioner of the CCG. There’s no investigator left that deserves it more, and the truth is that if Seungcheol had been offered the position he would have turned it down. Wonwoo is a secret, but a stain is a stain even if there are no regrets. The worst thing Hyungwon has done is meet with #113, and even that was to benefit the CCG. And maybe all Seungcheol did was fall in love, but it feels like so much more than that. He kissed Wonwoo with the taste of blood in his mouth, knowing that he’d eaten some time before, and he felt nothing about the life lost. 

He starts taking the cases no one else wants. Too gruesome, too bloody, too high ranked. Seungcheol fights S ranked ghouls alone, and he wins. He _wins_. Rams Head and The Final One loom like a shadow, like some inevitable conclusion he cannot escape. Their names follow him, wrung out in screams from the ghouls he cuts down, whispered in the shadows while he tracks. 

He still can’t shake the habit of checking for Wonwoo among the dead. He wonders if he will ever be able to shake it. Ghouls are predators of humans, monsters with perfect camouflage, but Seungcheol has seen Wonwoo naked underneath him, seen him dappled in sunlight, seen him blood soaked with black eyes. His heart still aches. He still wants him, even when he knows it’s better to leave this part of his life behind.

It’s hard to call someone a monster when you love them.

**♟♟♟**

“I found you a partner,” Hyungwon says. This shakes Seungcheol out of his thoughts, and he rushes to stand up, _Commissioner_ tumbling out of his mouth in his haste. Hyungwon waves a dismissive hand. “There’s no one here. Drop the formalities, Seungcheol.”

He gathers himself. It’s just Hyungwon. Just Hyungwon.

“Right. Of course.” Seungcheol takes a breath and sits back down. “You said partner?”

Hyungwon takes a seat in one of the chairs in front of his desk and nods. “Fresh from the Academy. Top of his class. I see a lot of potential in him.” Their eyes meet and Hyungwon smiles. “I think with your guidance he’ll be one of the best the CCG has ever seen.”

It’s been a struggle reminding himself that Wonwoo was a lapse, a moment of weakness on his otherwise impeccable record. That to everyone else, Special Class Investigator Choi Seungcheol is a man who deserves the wide eyed awe new recruits give him.

“What else do I need to know about him?” Seungcheol asks. “I feel like there’s something you’re not telling me.”

Hyungwon grins. _Perceptive as always_ , his look says. “The two of you have a...history. His name is Joshua Hong. You might remember him from the university killings a while back.”

 _Joshua_. 

Seungcheol can’t help but smile. So he really did join the CCG. Made it to the top of his class and everything. 

“He personally requested to be partnered with you, and I don’t see any reason to deny him,” Hyungwon says. “But you’re my friend. If there’s some reason you don’t want him, I won’t force you.”

For the first time in a long time, Seungcheol feels like he’s finally done something right.

“I’d be honored to have him as my partner.” There is so much he can teach him. What he learned from Hui. The mistakes he’s made all on his own, the victories, too. He can make Joshua into an investigator that can rival even Zhang Yixing.

Hyungwon nods, ghost of a smile still on his face, and stands to take his leave. 

“I’m glad to hear it. He’ll be starting next week.” He turns to look at Seungcheol, hand on the doorknob. “One more thing. I’ve got a hell of a case for you. Right up your alley. The file will be on your desk by this afternoon.” 

“It must be pretty ugly for you to say that,” Seungcheol says. A pinprick of fear works through his veins.

Hyungwon’s eyes seem to lose their warmth. “I haven’t seen binge eating quite like this since #113. Check the file. You’ll understand.”

Hyungwon shuts the door on his way out. The file ends up in his hands not even two hours later.

There’s security footage of a ghoul from the back. His kagune are high on his shoulder blades, fanned out like wings. Long hair that just touches the top of his kagune. Around him are more dead bodies than Seungcheol cares to count. The walls are splattered with blood. There is no number or rank. The ghoul is, so far, a complete mystery. In the corner of the file is handwriting that makes Seungcheol’s blood freeze.

**Code Name: Angel.**

**Author's Note:**

> I know that Wonwoo and Seungcheol are not technically "together" at the end of this, but I'm asking all of you to trust me. I'm twitter user Woncheoling I would never let this stand!! Seungcheol's story, and this AU, is not finished so please stay tuned!!
> 
> [Twitter](http://www.twitter.com/woncheoling) // [Curious Cat](https://curiouscat.me/tsukkitaeil)


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